The Path of Kindness - ED Recovery Through Self-Care

Self-care is the cornerstone of eating disorder recovery. It is essential to learn new ways to cope in order to move beyond food and body obsession. Notice that I say cope and not distract. The very nature of eating disorder is rooted in disconnection. In order to heal, a foundation of support needs to be cultivated that allows us to feel held through difficulties, while keeping connected to our experience and emotions.

In order to enter fully into recovery, the eating disorder identity needs to be shed so the authentic self can emerge. This requires us to make the long journey from our heads, into our hearts. As we explore our interests and passions, we align with our purpose. When we dare to dream, we discover who we truly are and find our feet firmly on the heart-centered path. Rather than tightening our grip and continuing to cling to the notion that our issues are caused by food or the size of our bodies, we need to recognize that these distortions exist because of a deep call within us for something more meaningful. What our souls really long for is connection and fulfillment. Our eating disorder issues are merely a representation of these needs going unmet.

As we learn to respond through self-care when faced with potentially triggering situations, our reactive attachment to the eating disorder falls away. We find empowerment in our ability to face any issue with a spirit of love and receptivity for the teaching inherent in the experience.

It can be challenging to think of alternatives when feeling overwhelmed. I have found it helps to have some self-care options in mind before stress strikes. Consider the list below tools for your toolbox. The next time you feel triggered, instead of turning to the dysfunction of eating disorder, empower yourself with self-care.

~55 Ways to Nurture Self-Care~

• Go for a stroll in nature.
• Listen to your favorite music and dance like no one's watching.
• Sing your heart out.
• Write a letter expressing bottled-up emotions. Then release the letter by safely burning it, or burying it in the ground as a symbolic act of surrendering the issue.
• Rewrite the story of a painful experience in your life. In the retelling, give yourself the opportunity to say all those things you weren't able to express at the time.
• Visit or call a friend who truly loves and supports you.
• Paint your feelings on a canvas.
• Mold your intangible emotions into something you can see and feel by working with clay.
• Using push-pins chart a course of all the places you would love to travel on a world map.
• Create space to dream.
• Light candles in a darkened room and listen to Loreena McKennit, Mazzy Star, Deva Premal, Mozart, or any music that stirs your soul.
• Breathe slowly and rhythmically into the places you are holding in your body. Notice how the breath dissolves the tension and frees up space for emotional release.
• Experience the healing power of touch. Treat yourself to a massage.
• Slather on a luxurious body butter, sending love to every part of you.
• Slip a bath bomb into the tub and immerse yourself in a soothing soak.
• Indulge in a foot rub with a relaxing aromatherapy oil.
• Get crafty by exploring a creative hobby that has always interested you such as, beading, designing mandalas, woodworking, or knitting.
• Put together a scrapbook that chronicles your journey into recovery. Let it inspire you to see how far you have come.
• Make a vision board. Create a collage to call in your heart's desires.
• Enjoy the silence... surrender your worries to meditation.
• Get all decked out just for the fun of it and treat yourself to a day on the town.
• Find comfort in a warm cup of tea shared with a good listener.
• Light incense and allow its scent to carry your prayers to the heavens.
• Take your pup for a walk. If you don't have a pooch of your own, offer to walk the neighbor's dog.
• Get organized. Sort through your belongings. Collect clothes to donate. Clear out what has served its purpose and is no longer needed. Decorate your abode with some warming touches. Do so with intention, visualizing welcoming in the new as you release the old.
• Go on a road trip. Adventure down new roads. Go where you have never gone before.
• Invite a friend over and treat each other to a makeover. Let your new look represent the true you... the person you are now allowing yourself to be.
• Invite friends over for a slumber party reminiscent of the ones you had as a teenager.
• Write in your journal.
• Curl up in bed for a cozy nap.
• Steep in a jacuzzi.
• Pamper yourself with beauty treat like a facial or a mani and pedi.
• Go on a walk with camera in hand and take photos of the sights that inspire you.
• Head out for a bike ride and explore uncharted paths.
• Take a dip at the local pool.
• Visit the woods or the ocean and experience the grounding energy.
• Make a list of affirmations and read them out loud to yourself whenever you need a boost.
• Leave it all on the mat. Release with yoga.
• Cash in on kisses and hugs from loved ones when you need them most.
• Spend time with your pet.
• Capture your experience with a soundtrack. Put together a mixed CD of songs that describe what you are feeling at this time in your life. 
• Relax with a hot shower. Imagine the water washing away your worries. 
• Browse in a bookstore. What titles are you drawn to? How do you think this speaks to your current situation?
• Head downtown for a cup of coffee and some people watching.
• Visit a museum. Let yourself be inspired by the creative expression of others. What pieces speak to you? What feelings do they provoke? Can you connect these emotions with your current experience?
• Read your favorite book from childhood to remind yourself of simpler times and the magic of imagination.
• Have someone you love brush or braid your hair.
• Punch a pillow to let go of anger.
• Have a good cry. Feel the relief of letting go.
• Pleasure yourself.
• Make a cuddle date with your mate with no expectations for it to lead to more.
• Grab your crayons and color in a coloring book. Feel free to scribble outside the lines.
• Start a gratitude journal. Each night before turning in list at least three blessings that graced your day. When you are having a rough time, read through your journal to remind yourself of how much you have to be grateful for.
• Have a pajama day. Lounge about in your cozies guilt-free and do a whole lot of nothing.
• Treat yourself to a beautiful bouquet of flowers to remind yourself that love begins with you.